You see, I've always had this two year rule in my mind for how long I want to date someone before we get married. After twenty-four months together, you usually know whether your partner is someone you could really commit to—forever.But a lot of my friends have been getting married with fewer than this magical two years under their belts, and it's making me second-guess my rule. Does it really matter at all how long you date before you get married?
"I recommend a minimum of one year provided each partner has a good, clear understanding of what they are looking for in a mate," says Stephen J.These couples dated an average of eighteen months and were engaged for half that time.Of those who were quicker to marry, the study found that the marriages survived to the seven-year mark, but many divorced after that.Have you talked about what you both want from marriage? But I'm convinced that it's experiencing life together, through major occurrences (like a job layoff) and mundane activities (like Wal-Mart trips) that will allow us to decide whether we should get married.The more time we've been together, the more we've seen each other handle life, and this is the best way to build the foundation for a long and happy marriage.Betchen, DSW, author of , agrees that dating one to two years is safest.“There are no hard and fast rules," Amodeo acknowledges."But I must admit that I feel nervous when I hear about people getting married within a year (or even two) of meeting.I did some digging and reached out to relationship therapists and psychologists to get their thoughts.Here's what the professionals have to say about the ideal length of time to date."There is no ideal time to date before marriage," Firestone says. If a couple has been married for fifty years, but they have been miserable and treating each other badly during those years, is it really a good marriage? a marriage will last, but I feel more confident giving our relationship the time we need to be intentional and discerning.Even arranged marriages work sometimes, and they haven’t dated at all. "If you're seriously considering marriage, you should focus on discerning whether or not you are truly ready for marriage, despite the amount of time you have been dating. Maybe it didn't have to be two years, or maybe it will be three.