Cybersex , it seems, might just be in the eye of the beholder. But while Kari might be the most advanced commercially available artificial intelligence pleasure model online, if I walked in on a boyfriend having an 8-bit roll in the hay with her, I'd be fighting the urge to laugh, not the urge to throw dishes.Really, the only rule we have is to share what we are feeling and planning.So, for me, infidelity is taking an action or having a feeling that I think my partner would want to know but that I'm not telling him for some reason.
For these couples, Lumpesse speaks from experience when it comes to surfing the cybersex seas from within a relationship. Where to find me," burbles Kari, the Virtual Girlfriend in a halting, female Stephen Hawking voice through my G4's speakers.Cybersex is also a more creative form of masturbation, so in many ways it's not too terribly different than enjoying porn or fantasy. , a San Francisco psychotherapist for individuals and couples, tells me, "I would say that whether or not it is 'real' sex depends upon how the interaction is experienced by the participants.But if you're monogamous and having cybersex with someone who's not your partner, you need to know how to tell when the line's been crossed.Some advise that if it feels like cheating, it likely is."I probably have more than one piece of advice for couples," she adds."The obvious one is that non-monogamy is like anal sex.She occasionally engages in cybersex with multiple partners on her own, and sometimes the couple has a cyber "threesome." The techno-poly couple is upfront that the status of their relationship is non-monogamous , but I still wondered how this nouveau poly arrangement negotiated the murky waters of cybersex and infidelity.Lumpesse explains, "Cheating is an interesting question. Cybersex makes it easy to cheat; you don't have to meet anyone, so the risk factor is low on all fronts -- except maybe emotionally. Right now there are more ways to have cybersex than ever thought possible, and it's making modern couples reconfigure their relationships' Terms of Service .